Once again, I bring you another simply riveting journal entry as I key-tap my way through procrastination.

...and I've just realised that I have absolutely nothing to report on. Weird. Everything I think about saying seems so... revoltingly self-centred =/ And nothing really seems worthwhile. But that's the problem with life, though, isn't it? It's often difficult to find things, or people, who are, or, make things worth it.

I suppose it's worth mentioning that uni is just about over for the year. I have my final exam on Monday. I'm so far behind it's not funny, this whole semester has been a train-wreck. Oh well, I guess I can be thankful that it's just Japanese, and Japanese is only an elective of mine. And thanks to the universities being somewhat moronic, my units with UQ can't count towards my GPA attained through the bulk of my units at QUT. So I suppose there is a silver lining to ever cloud? heh.
Who knows, maybe I'll pass. Although last semester's final exam was horrid! D:

I suppose I *could* have been spending my time off classes studying for this final, but instead I've been busy celebrating quite a few things. I'm never once to resist any reason to celebrate - and I've been having a blast celebrating anything and everything. For once I actually feel a sense of prolonged happiness (and for anyone that's known me for any length of time, they'll know that I often refer to happiness as a luxury item that some of us simply can't afford). It has been quite a roller coaster, but for the first time,probably ever, I have had a sense of happiness that has lasted for longer that a couple of hours. In fact I've been feeling happy, insanely happy, for days at a time - sometimes lasting a whole week! It feels so amazing to be happy. I'm still adjusting to it, and I struggle to wrap my head around the fact that people frequently feel this 'happiness'! Simply stunning! It's like... suddenly having your soul restored, and your spirit growing wings. I really lack the words to describe how wonderful happiness feels.
The only down side I can see to this, is that sooner or later, it's going to go away. It already has gone away a few times, in a sudden way. But it has returned. Like a roller coaster, really. I'm concerned that the happiness will go away, for a very, very long time. But I'm trying not to let that get me down. Same goes for the thoughts that I may, actually have bipolar and NOT PTSD - the symptoms I share with bipolar disorder are quite frightening. But if I go on stronger medication, I risk becoming a zombie again - last time I was a zombie for about 2 years. And I'd much rather ride a roller coaster, enjoying the ups AND the downs, then feeling nothing at all. I dread feeling nothing at all most.

HA! And you all thought I was only mildly 'quirky'!

I can't wait until my final exam is over, because this feeling of happiness has left intense pangs of inspiration. There is so much I want to do, so much I want to create. It's amazing to feel this inspired, energetic, and driven! I can't wait to sink my teeth back into art, I missed creating things.

Oh, I mentioned I was celebrating things earlier, didn't I?
Things I have celebrated
Halloween! Had an absolute blast! House party on the Friday, and then Clubbing on the Saturday. Dressed up for both occasions, in the same outfit. When it's time to party, I will party hard It was honestly one of the best weekends I have had in a looong time. <3 everyone.

The end of classes at uni! This was partly celebrated over the halloween weekend, but also celebrated every moment since not being in class


Losing weight and toning up! It's such a wonderful thing to celebrate I pretty much celebrate this every time I work out And any time I jump on the scales or look in the mirror. I'm getting a more "athletic" appearance. And I was most excited last night when I realised that my ribs are starting to make an appearance again, and my thighs are getting smaller. Feels like pure win Unfortunately it's all still in early stages, so I still look a bit crap when I'm wearing clothes - but *I* know the changes are there, and *I* know there are still MANY more changes to come

Being single again! Yes, after seven months of being in a relationship, I am back to being single. Although I'm pretty sure there are a great deal of people around who weren't even aware I *wasn't* single, ahaha. ... Mothers lock up your sons, daughters, etc? Don't get me wrong (and subsequently accuse me of being petty/immature/whateverfloatsyourboat), I'm not celebrating the end of the relationship, but more the 'newly single' aspect. I *almost* forgot how much fun being single is. Good times, indeed! And <3 all the friends who have been celebrating this with me You are all more than welcome to celebrate me being single at any time

Being happy! Is there any greater reason on this planet to celebrate? I think not! PARTY PARTY PARTY!


Other news:
My birfdae is next month - not entirely sure what I'm going to do to celebrate it D: It's always too hard to celebrate my brithday. I aways *want* to celebrate it, but my celebrations always fail for one reason or another. And most people can never come to my celebrations because they're busy working or doing "family" things that centre around jesus n shit =/ So, what should I do you guys?! (Protip: I'm turning 22. < insert gasps here from people shocked to learn that I'm not 16 xD > )

...what was that about me having nothing to report on? Oh dear. Revoltingly self-centred? What?

OH AND GOOD LUCK TO ROBYN AT THE MADMAN NATIONALS THIS WEEKEND!!

Also, how amazing is this song? [link] It's my absolute favourite song right now. The lyrics are divine! Oh Placebo, stop making me want to chase magical and impossibly divine love!

everyone.